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Cowman Info
Until we decide a better use for this page, it will be home to the
"Amazing Cow-Glossary," a listing of many of the unique things in
Cowman's world.
Amazing Cow-Glossary:
Alftan: An ex-United States Spy Agency field operative. He got to use all kinds of fancy gadgets, like a pen with ink in it AND a pen with something else in it... but I can't remember what that was. Now he tends Good Manor as Nate Page's butler. He does a mighty poor job of it too. For some reason he doesn't like Wereman at all. Maybe it was those muddy footprints.
Bipedal Smoking Dog, The: A tall dog that stands on two legs AND smokes! What kind of dog would do that to his lungs? Oh, and he can talk too.
Blackring City: A strange and heavily polluted place. The city's streets are built in concentric circles. At the center of the city there is a constantly burning bonfire where all the city folk throw their trash.
Bootmaker Bob: A crazy midget cowboy. He wants to make boots out of Cowman. Eww!
Cow Face: A villain who is half bull and half man. Cowman accidentally created him when he gave himself super powers. Of course Loaf'O's were involved...
Cowman: The greatest hero in Blackring City. He has an invulnerable costume and a utility belt full of gadgets to complement his amazing cow-like strength. He also has the ability to jump really high, because the bull that kicked him was descended from the cow that jumped over the moon (whether the cow actually jumped over the moon, or just appeared to jump over the moon, is unsubstantiated). In the picture to the left he's wearing his special Christmas costume.
Elvis Ogmund Walmanshire: Wereman's true identity, though he gave up changing out of his costume years ago. He doesn't even take it off to bathe... if he does bathe.
Hard Brain: A crazy lady with a hardened head. She wants to get revenge on everyone in the city for the accident that caused the hardening.
Jhon Stik: Cowman's 2000 year old mentor. The mightiest Hero who ever existed. His name is spelled wrong, but it's been that way so long that it would be crazy to fix it now.
Justice: Ah, Justice! The heart of the Super Hero. The Love of Cowman's life. The butter that he spreads upon the soft bread of the city!
Justin Sane: Ostrich's true identity. He may never forgive his parents for his name. And he's certain he'll never forgive the World Super Hero Union for trapping him as a sidekick.
Loaf'O's: The world's favorite recycled food!
Loafzilla: An unearthly, Loaf'O' based beast, who likes rampaging. Why do enormous beasts always love to rampage?
Nate Page: Cowman's true identity. Once just a wanna-be super hero, Nate was given his invulnerable costume by the legendary Jhon Stik (Yeah, it's supposed to be spelled wrong). Later he was kicked in the head by a radioactive bull, and given the strength and endurance of a cow.
One Face: A childhood friend of Wereman. He was thrust into villainy by a series of strange accidents, and has now become an enemy of Cowman.
Ostrich: Cowman's sidekick. Lazy and complainy, but smarter and better at fighting than Cowman. He also has limited telepathic abilities which are amplified when he sticks his head in the ground. Ostrich doesn't normally have ornaments in his hair, but sometimes he gets decorated on special occasions.
Terrific Three, The: One of the better known super hero teams around. Led by Mrs. Terrific, the group also includes Senile Boy, The Wig, The Human Porch, and Admiral Atomic.
Trashkin: An evil species of trash can that likes to cause trouble.
U.S.S.A.: The United States Spy Agency. The most secret spy organization in the country. Operatives pretend to be merely CIA agents if caught.
Wereman: One of the strangest superheroes we know of. He was bitten by a wereman when he was a teenager, and now he chages into different people every time the moon is full. For some strange reason his hair makes him look like an Elvis impersonator, and he can't change it because it is a part of the "curse of the wereman." Wereman normally lives in a box with a red "W" painted on the side. This box also serves as his car, the Weremobile.
World Super Hero Union: The name is pretty obvious. They regulate super hero activity, and assign heroes to their cities to make sure they are properly distributed (heroes can usually pick their location if they want it enough). They also will train sidekicks and pair them with superheroes.
Now Available:
Cowman's Hard Times: part 1. Nathan Cushman's original Cowman adventure! Newly re-edited for 2005. Available in pdf format for download or web view.
Excerpt:
"I should have known!" exclaimed Cowman. "The Human Porch has turned to the side of evil, joined with One Face, and attacked my city. I'll have to call the other four members of the Terrific Three."
"That's a video game, Cowman," said Ostrich, "and it looks like Alftan was doing pretty good. Besides, the screen shows The Human Porch pounding in the only face of One Face. How does that lead you to think they joined forces?"
"Villains." Cowman turned off the game. "You know how they bicker."
Read More
Other Cowman Related Stuff:
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Shop:
Heroic Cowman Gear by Nathan Cushman. Mighty shirts, buttons, magnets, and more!
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Wallpapers:
A variety of desktop backgrounds, including the "Christmas Cowman" wallpaper seen to the left.
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Games:
Harvey Herela's Tic-Tac-Toe featuring Cowman characters drawn by Nathan Cushman. Play against a friend or three difficulties of computer a.i.
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Announcements:
1/30/08
Can Cowman do math? Is the US legal system fair? Ask-a-Hero!
10/26/07
How does Alftan to more than 3 things at once? Ask-a-Hero! I mean... read the new Ask-a-Hero!
7/16/07
Even more great Ask-a-Hero! Now loaded with RSS! We know that makes no sense!
5/21/07
Is Cowman really Dear Abby? Is Wereman an urchin? Find out today!
5/13/07
It is 2007, not 2006. Ignore our brief experiment in time travel.
5/10/06 ???
Like most weeks we've updated the store, and added new items.
3/13/07
Cowman 2, the classic TI-83 game, is now available for those with a graphlink.
2/20/07
The short film, Wrath of the Cowman, is now online.
1/9/06
New Movies section. See The Wereman Christmas Special.
11/16/05
New Christmas Desktop Wallpapers
10/31/05
Heroic Halloween Safety Advice! (Warning: may not contain actual advice)
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